westernkanye:

my voice is girly when I talk to strangers but when I’m with friends I turn into morgan freeman

thurdsay:

*has tumblr open in three tabs*

absolvtely:

stop unfollowing me I’m pregnant with your child

(Source: gypsums)

trait:

i had the best dream ever last night and then i woke up and wanted to cry because i knew it would never be true

cybercum:

*hears footsteps* *closes 12 tabs and goes to facebook*

(Source: coolurl)

flamingno:

[panics but not in a disco sort of way]

coolscar:

*every highschool student when the teacher doesn’t show up after 2 minutes* “you know there’s a rule where if the teacher’s not here after 15 minutes we can just leave”

(Source: torracat)

god:

youngvlcanoes:

god ur annoying

excuse me?

(Source: youngvlxanoes)

straightboymamoru:

if a song was in shrek theres no way to un-associate it with shrek its forever going to be a shrek song

big-burrito:

world’s okayest friend

(Source: vaginaed)